I’m going to touch on a very sore subject.
I take no pleasure in writing about this (well, maybe I do, a little…), but I feel as a journalist here in Poway that it is my responsibility, nay, my commitment to highlight controversies in the neighborhood I love as a way of seeking reconciliation and resolution between aggrieved parties.
The twist in this controversy is that this isn’t a dispute between two different neighbors — it’s a conflict between two people living under the same roof.
I should probably provide some background.
A few days ago, I was walking our dog Molly down the street when I suddenly stopped by a home of some very good friends of ours. I’ll call them Kerry and Ken. They’re otherwise happily married, and they have a couple of kids. By all s, they are wonderful people who care about the community, and we love spending time with them.
The reason Molly and I stopped after reaching their house was because something had changed. Out in their front yard they have a beautiful canopy-type tree that covers most of their front yard. It’s a big, beautiful tree, the kind I imagine you see a lot in the Southern states.
What caught my attention was that instead of the grass that was normally underneath the tree, the grass was now replaced by what could be best described as small boulders and large rocks, varying in size and color, spread out under the shade of the tree, interrupted only by a few small cacti interspersed seemingly randomly throughout the entire patch.
It almost looks like someone deliberately bulldozed a rock wall and put the demolished remains under the tree. The only problem is that I don’t ever them having a big rock wall in their front yard.
Now, I’m no landscape architect. I’m certainly no expert at the pros and cons of various outdoor aesthetic styles. I’m definitely not qualified to determine the design style of what Kerry and Ken had done to their yard. What would you call this look? Post modern? No. Rustic Americana? Not quite. Wait, I’ve got it! Rubble chic!
As I said before, I’m no judge of landscape design. For our own yard, my design tastes would best be described as, “Whatever you’d like, honey!” That design ethic has served me well over the years.
But while I’m completely neutral on Kerry and Ken’s landscape choices, I did have some questions. Luckily for me, my wife Maya and I had already planned to go out to dinner with Kerry and Ken later in the week. A perfect time to ask some questions.
As we all settled into our seats at the table, I casually asked the question, “I see you guys are doing some changes in your yard. What’s it going to look like when you’re done?”
You could hear a gentle sigh after I asked my question. Then it was silent. Maya and I darted nervous looks at each other and Ken lowered his head toward the table as if he was resigned to what was going to happen next.
“Wayne,” Kerry said with exasperation. “It’s done! It’s supposed to look like that!”
Kerry went on. “He… “, looking at Ken, “He said he would take care of the front yard! He said he had an IDEA!” She went on. “He got plans…”, and I interjected, “This was a plan?”.
Kerry’s eyes widened. “Yes! We actually paid money on plans to make it look like that! Can you believe it?”
Ken, head still bowed toward the table, meekly gestured, “It doesn’t look like I thought it would.”
“That’s right, it doesn’t look like you thought it would! Wayne, you can describe it with any of the words you want. Atrocious! Ridiculous! Horrendous! Take your pick!”
Ken then tried valiantly to salvage the situation. “We’re going to take some of the rocks away.”
“How is that going to make any difference?”
After a few more minutes of verbal jousting and me wiping tears of laughter from my face, we all settled in for an amazing meal with some great friends. All was well, and that’s the important thing.
The only hiccup at the end of the evening was when Ken said he was making some plans for his backyard patio overhang.
I never realized until then that if you listen carefully, you can actually hear when someone is rolling their eyes.
Wayne Chan, a Poway resident, writes about family and community life and shares humorous views of topics of the day.
